No rest for the angry – A purpose driven rage Part 1
So I have been in self reflection mode and less in the angry hippie mindset as of late, but I found that the angry hippie is never resting. That mental status can be activated with the mere mention of some choice phrases. For instance, I was having coffee the other day with my friend Stephanie at a little local coffee and pastry place, and suddenly it was as if fate was pushing me towards the realization that the path I am to follow and focus on is the path of the angry hippie. What can I say, I was in self reflection mode, I may be over analyzing the situation, but I will let you all decide that.
So in this reflective state, I have been wondering about my purpose. Angie filled me in on my purpose as defined in a Numerological sense, which seemed to fit into place with my angry hippie goals. And then in the coffee house, I realized that perhaps the universe was trying to back that up with a few weird coincidental happenstances all landing me full on in angry hippie mode. First off, as we were at the counter ordering our coffee, I noticed a sign that said the coffee place was looking for a baker. It just so happened that Stephanie is a baker looking for a job in that field, and she did not notice the sign, I did. I pointed it out to her, and at the bottom of the notice, it stated to inquire of David.
David just happened to be sitting next to the counter and when Stephanie asked about the position, she and Dave sat down for an initial inquiry type interview. This left me all by my lonesome to pick a table. I looked around the room, and out of the many available seats I chose a small table for two against the wall across from a table of four older than me folks with pages and notebooks scattered about along the large surface. Stephanie, who I had met up with specifically so we could talk, was now otherwise engaged so I was left with no one to converse with. So my mind began to wander around the room…as did my ears. Not on purpose, I was not trying to eavesdrop on anyone, it just sort of happened that way.
…Not quite done yet, but it’s a bit lengthy so I am dropping the rest of the story behind the cut
It’s funny how the mind works. Not just the mind, but also how the universe works. (Though admittedly, that whole universe thing could just be the mind thing again.) Had I not been recently dashed against the rocks of personal failure and had not been steeped in the self reflection mode that I had been wandering through, I may not have picked up on any of this as anything more than mere coincidence. But as I noticed the numerous things that had to fall into place for me to be where I was at that exact moment in time, with the existential questions of purpose in my mind that I was plagued with, had to be more than coincidence. I could only take away that it was fate trying to shine it’s guiding light into my eyes. For, of all the people gathered in the coffee house that morning, I could not imagine a worse person to have sat next to the group of folks that I sat next to, other than me.
Bits of conversation began to float through my ears as I glanced around in my secluded boredom and contemplative consciousness, and I heard things from the table. Things like, ‘foster children’, ‘mentoring’, ‘immersion programs’, and ‘Kingdom Ministries’. Suddenly the angry hippie in me activated and I could not help but let as much of their conversation make it’s way into my ears as was able. Now when I talk about the ‘angry hippie’ I am more talking about the way I look at the world now, rather than an adopted personality change that I undergo. For instance, I do not believe that your average person would have been taken aback by the combination of these statements (Mainly because I do not think your average person would be eavesdropping on the tables around them, but I was bored and tired and ultimately uninterested in being in my own head for the moment.)
Now I probably would have quickly abandoned this invasive task pretty early after the start, had I not heard another choice statement, early in their dialog. ‘But isn’t this against the law?’ the gentlemen at the table asked, forcibly filling his voice with mock concern. ‘We’ve had to use some creative language with the organization to work around the laws.’ Sealed! Angry Hippie is on and raging!!
These people were planning multi level systems and structures, either being put into place, or at least planning to be put into place, to specifically target indoctrinating foster children through mentors and foster parents. They took notes about different levels of commitment they could coerce church members into, and they spoke about the ‘billions of years they would be giving these kids with Christ’ with proud smiles painted across their faces. So proud that they were creatively circumventing the law for Jesus, that they talked about how they could grow the scope of this project. Now I know that some people still do not understand the angry hippie activation at this convoluted conversation, and some would even argue that they are trying to do something good for these kids. Bullshit.
You see, over the span of the half an hour plus that I sat listening to these plans, I never once heard any person at the table voice any concern about the lives these kids would have in the here and now, beyond the immersion programs that would force this twisted Christian ideology onto these unsuspecting children who are merely looking to be loved. And some may say that they will be loved! Eternally… by Christ. Right. Not what I was talking about, or what they were looking for, so go peddle that piece of shit argument elsewhere. Indoctrinating, by definition, means making someone learn to accept a set of beliefs uncritically. Who needs critical thinking, anyways? Certainly not children! And this kind of mental manipulation cannot be unpleasant or harmful for kids or using these kinds of tactics on children would be illegal…oh, wait. Well, I mean, really illegal. Like where the language of the law is written so that you can not just easily sidestep it with some creative wordplay.
And to that end, what people are you attracting to your programs? You are not concerned with who would make a good parent, or who would provide a good home life. You are only concerned with who could be the most effective dogma enforcer on these innocent children. Well fuck you and your twisted ministries’ mission! Fostering is a huge responsibility, that is NEVER, EVER to be taken lightly or for any other reason than to provide that bond and love to a child whose life is missing it. It should simply be about this life here and what you can provide for them now. The love, shelter, and understanding they need to grow and find their path in this life. Every parent, should want their child to find their way, not force them in the way they feel most comfortable with their child going. These immersion programs are not exactly of that same mindset. And lets be clear…there is a huge difference in offering guidance and advice as a child develops, and indoctrinating them beyond reason. One is mindful, the other is mind-fucking!
And what if these children cannot learn to accept these force fed beliefs…a good question that will pick up with part two of this tale of purpose and rage. More of this rant to come!